That's right, I dug up some letters and other written things... and I sat down today, in a fight of melancholy and soul searching, reading things with a surprisingly clear mind. And that lead me to re-evaluating many things I did, foolish for most part, in the past. Suffice to say, it's been a constructively painful day night, and I'm still awake - at seven in the morning. *sigh*

I think it's right to say that there are so many things all of us would desperately want to go back and do differently, and it's absolutely impossible - which is what gives us so much grief, when thinking back long enough. But... at least I know recognize a pattern of behaviour and can see far more clearly what a wretched thing I've been. *slight smile* Perhaps I can try to weed myself, and prune out anything that resembles my realizations, to be a better, improved 'me' one day. It's enough to keep hope, at the moment.

I've been away from this place so long I don't even know if people still recognize, or care, or simply bother. But... perhaps. All hope is not lost, and going back to read so many things written in here has also revealed a lot of bitter and sweet truths. We all learn as we go along, and the farther we've come - the more we've had time to figure out, wishfully thinking. Thank you for anyone who still remembers who 'Tumnaloth' is, though you may find her changed - she has not forgotten.